The thing about my weight loss is it happened matter of factly.

There was no big wake up call.

It was just a change in direction.

Instead of my usual right, I went left.

I just viewed this aspect of my life with a new maturity.

Here is what I looked liked all of my adult life:


It is also what I looked like through most of my childhood and all of my adolescence.

Now, when I say that there wasn't a wake-up call, I'm not being entirely honest.

I had a heart attack scare on Thanksgiving 2003.

After that I developed heart palpitations and panic disorder (undiagnosed and a pre-existing condition).

But I did nothing about it.

I just went back to eating.

And my "life" continued.

Yet, I was still having the palpitations and my general practionier didn't know the cause.

I was sent for a CAT Scan of my heart and a stress test at a hospital.

They couldn't perform either test because I weighed too much.

That is why I started weight watchers and walking in the park twice a week.

But my condition didn't change.

I would have palpitations, go to the emergency room, be diagnosed "healthy," and return home just to do it again a week later.

This went on for about a year.

Until I finally had my CAT Scan and stress test at a independent lab.

The results showed two things; first, I had heart disease related to my obesity and second, the doctors needed a better look at my heart.

To be safe my Cardiologist put me on medication for heart disease, which I am still on.

He then sent me for a cardiac catheterization. This procedure consists of a camera being inserted into your groin artery and snaked up through your body into your heart.

Before, during, and after this procedure, I kept hearing "you're too young to have heart disease. You shouldn't be here."

And they were right. The CAT Scan/Stress Test showed a false positive.

My heart was perfectly fine.

So, I celebrated by having a turkey cheese burger with onion rings and french fries at my local diner.

That's one of the biggest positives of weight watchers as well as one of it's biggest negatives.

But the catheterization was kind of deceptive.

As it turned out I did have a enlarged heart.

But it wasn't as a result of clogged arteries which is what the catheterization was for. Though, it wasn't explained to me and I thought I was fine until I changed cardiologists.

Well, to get to the point of this post, May 24th will be the two year anniversary of joining the gym.

And June 3rd will be the two year anniversary of meeting John.

John was my personal trainer, motivator, dietitian, and friend.

In eight months I lost almost 160 pounds.

It took 25 years to put it all on and only eight months to take it off.

In April, I celebrated my one year anniversary of keeping the weight off on my own.

This is what I look like today





I went from 380* pounds in June of 2004 to 225 pounds in April of 2005.

I now weigh 230 pounds and workout three to four times a week.

I still have the occasional palpitation and/or panic attack but they are few and far between.

You can probably understand why I've been having problems with "Lisa" ad "Michelle" now.

Dave** grew up with me my entire life.

He has always been there for me.

And I don't know how to get rid of him.

Worse, I think I'm afraid to.




* = My actual weight loss is based on the weight lost with John. I did weigh over 400 pounds before the cardiac catheterization (407lbs. to be exact) but got down to the 380 range with weight watchers and walking.

** = Dave refers to Lost episode #18, Season 2