I fucked up with "Deena" as well.

I truly must hate myself to do this.

She told me that I ruined it and I haven't really heard from her since the incident but I am not holding my breath.

I am not sure what the future holds for me but I cannot continue in this manner.

I must discover why I try to destroy everything beautiful in my life.

I sent her a text message asking if I still had a chance with her.

I've yet to hear back.

But like I said I am not holding my breath.

P.S. - I think that for my 100th Post (which is the next one) I will supply you with the answer that "Deena" gives me. Depending on that, it may be the last time I post.